May's Esquire magazine has a great article by A.J. Jacobs on his efforts to find via the Internet a good man for his shy, beautiful, 27-year-old nanny. I particularly liked this bit:

Originally, I planned to send a personal ding letter to each of the unsuitable guys. But the volume is overwhelming. By day four, we've gotten close to fifty approaches. I'm starting to become shockingly picky. I have a growing list of instant deal breakers:

• If the guy uses the word lady or ladies in his opening e-mail.
• If the guy lists his best feature as "butt" (ironically or not).
• If the guy uses more than two exclamation points in one sentence. (One enthusiast wrote: "Hello there beautiful!!!!!!!!!!!!!")
• If the guy misspells the first word of his introductory essay. ("Chemestry is important.") I don't want to be a spelling snob, but the first word?
• If the guy's opening photo features a shot in which his head is tilted more than 20 degrees to the left or right.
• If the guy has a photo of his Jet Ski or snowmobile on his page.
• If the guy is wearing sunglasses, any hat besides a baseball cap, or is bare chested in his main photo.
• If the guy refers to female anatomy anywhere in his initial correspondence (e.g., "I'm not a professional gynecologist, but, uh, I'd be happy to take a look").

Never in my life have I had such power. It's tremendous. Yes, at first I feel guilty about failing to respond to 70 percent of these guys. But it's just not possible. And in a way, it makes me feel better about my life as a single man. Maybe when my calls to beautiful women went unreturned, it wasn't because I was hideous or the women were evil. It was just a matter of time management. Or at least I can tell myself that.

Yeah, that's it! Time management! I feel much better about myself.