This is kinda funny

Matthew Hoy
By Matthew Hoy on November 23, 2005

You don't really need to read past the first paragraph.

A suspected drunken driver fumbling his ABCs turned to police asking if he could substitute with a math problem.

Police refused -- apparently language skills are more difficult to master while inebriated than math skills. Yeah. That's the story that this journalist is going to stick to -- ABCs are far more challenging than multivariable calculus.

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