How big is the tank?

Matthew Hoy
By Matthew Hoy on May 10, 2009

Sorry for the pun, but I can't get my arms around how in-the-tank you have to be to write this drivel:

"May I change the subject," said a prominent Washington theologian at a recent dinner. The conversation had been high-minded -- religion, philosophy, the nature of evil. "I'd like to talk about Michelle Obama's arms," he said.

He is a big fan of those arms. We then began a discussion about the significance of the first lady's arms. Actually, it turned out to be equally serious. Michelle Obama's arms, we determined, were transformational. Her arms are representative of a new kind of woman: young, strong, vigorous, intelligent, accomplished, sexual, powerful, embracing and, most of all, loving.

Today is Mother's Day. Today we should celebrate Michelle Obama's arms as the arms of a mother.

This is a woman who has the courage to say "I am mom in chief" and make her children and her family -- unapologetically -- her No. 1 priority. She is able to do this because she is so intelligent and accomplished that she doesn't have to prove anything to anyone. She is healthy enough to be able to say, this is who I am, these are my values and my priorities.

The author of this drivel, a self-avowed, small-minded atheist, oddly seems to have someone worthy of worship.

Just how big is the tank this woman is in? And how many acre-feet of Cherry Kool-Aid has she imbibed?

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